"Present Contentment is Based on Future Prospect"

Our former preacher, Dr. Gary Grey, used to state this collection of words now and then from the pulpit. The first few times I heard it, I don't remember really letting it register. Sounded like a nice thought, and then I was on to the next. But I'll never forget the day, rocking L back in the crying room, that I heard it on that little, tiny television and I finally let it resonate. Of course, on the surface, I knew the message that was being sent, but since the day it really sunk in, I have reminded myself of that phrase so, so many times.

Today, I was very blessed. Teachers CRAVE a day out of the confining four walls that surround us all day long, 9 months a year. Not being able to dash out for a change of scenery, lunch in the park or out with friends, or just run a midday errand can wear on you after a time (I can already hear it: but you have all summer!), and so when those rare occasions present themselves allowing you to take a field trip, you embrace them full-heartedly. Of course, all teachers do not feel this way, but I dread the day I don't look forward to a field trip!

Knowing this day was coming was enough to get me through a very rough Tuesday this week. Meetings that last forever with no end - really, no possible end, because we are human beings and cannot solve the titanic problems we and the students are facing, and then an afterschool tutoring session where 2 parents didn't even bother to leave the house to pick up their child until I called them (since they were already 10 minutes late), and McDonald's night. However, just knowing that the students and I would take a break from the norm and attend a field trip on a science topic, was enough to help me hold out. Present contentment was based on a future prospect.



Speaking of breaking out of the norm, although I am always happiest with my hair long, it is need of some color and trim attention. So is my dear girl's as well. We have ourselves a late morning appointment at a very swanky hair salon. 30 minute head, neck, and scalp massages are standard at this location, and better yet, my cut and color are free for my first visit! After our pampering, we will dine at HuHot, which is my girl's favorite lunch spot as of late, and then shop for some new clothes for our family pictures next weekend. This is looking like my kind of Saturday! I had just recently told my girl that we needed some girl time, at least once a month, just us two. Of course we have our usual things together, but a planned 'outing' gives us present contentment, based on a future prospect.



(photot courtesy of http://alexanderclan.blogspot.com/2008/10/valeria-boss-salon-experience.html)

Lastly, today as I drove to work, I believe it was David Jeremiah who was preaching on what happens to "little children" and then "infants" when they die. Morbid topic, I know, but so comforting what he said. In the loss of the 3 babies that we didn't carry to term, many people would offer condolences, reminding me over and over that I would hold, rock, and know those babies once I was in heaven. They would be there, waiting on me. Those words sounded nice, and of course I believed them, but today when He offered scripture (including Matthew 18:14), my heart let me not just believe on a surface level, but take it in, and look forward to it. Along with the eternal gift of life in heaven, He's also going to provide the pleasure of that reunion. More present contentment, based on a future prospect!

Sleepy girl...

C went to a sleepover last night of a friend she made when she was only 3 months old. These girls hit it off from the start. They are very compatable personalities and there has never been any drama when the two of them get together, just all play and fun. She called yesterday and C was thrilled to go spend the night with her since they go have always gone to different schools, that is, until next year.

Naturally, there wasn't a lot of sleep going on. The next afternoon, J had gone up to check on her and yelled down for me in a loud whisper to get my camera. I got there a second too late to snap the picture, but she had been sitting on her new little ottoman, looking into the corner where her two dance room mirrors come together, noticing how many faces she had at once (oh, to be a kid). Apparently, that was a pretty relaxing exercise because she fell asleep, sitting up, leaning into the corner, with a little stream of drool and steam down the mirror. This picture is when she heard my camera come on, and was a little less than amused at our giggling.

Resolutions...Ha!

I wonder how many of my facebook friends have posted that their New Year's Resolution is to not make any resolutions? Understandable. I can't help it though. I love the clean slate - at home, and in my classroom. My brain automatically looks around in December and says, "NEXT YEAR I'll _____."

So, here goes...

1. Blog at least once a month. I had come close to swearing off blogging entirely, until my cousin Ashley told me about the 'Blog book' that the Cutest Blog on the Block will print and make for you, all entries, backgrounds, and pictures in place. What a great way to 'scrapbook' your memories? Hopefully this will also help me remember the funnies with the kids I swear I'll never forget, and can't remember the next week.



2. Use my craft room more. A wall of cabinetry, a table with handy drawers, cute colors my friends helped me paint on the walls, and its own bathroom. It all pretty much goes unused. WHY does the North room have to be so cold, though??? I'll be purchasing a space heater soon and hanging some shelves. Hopefully this room will get the attention it deserves.

3. The same old, run-of-the-mill resolution of healthier living. I have my own plans for this, but I'm already 2 hours behind today on the treadmill and 2 glasses behind on the water. My guess is I'm still in vacation mode thinking Monday is a much more appropriate start date.

That's it. Just three. Not gonna make a Top Ten list this year, which is actually a great memory.

J, my family and I were in flight to Cancun, Mexico 15 years ago this week. We flew on New Year's Day and J and I, a whole 6 months of dating behind us, made our Top Ten Resolution Lists. He should have known to run at that very moment. I was suggesting resolutions to him that he might make. Looking back, a lot of guys would see that as annoying or pushy. J loved it. He has a number of people in his life that he routinely disagrees with, but from the beginning, what I say has always seemed to hold a shiny gold halo above it. What luck. These are the things that I didn't notice so much as we were dating, but other people did, and told me, "not to let this one get away," in all of their nice little ways. ;-)

I didn't.

Okay, #4.

4. Say what I'm thinking more often - when it's nice.

Just Gotta Wait a Little

My little sister was married last week.



We traveled to a tropical paradise setting for the most exciting & indulgent vacation we'd ever taken to join them in our group of 16 and witness a wedding that was zero stress, very little planning, and required no decorations due to the backdrop already being a masterpiece there on the Caribbean sea.

Thank goodness she wasn't like so many others and played the Rascal Flatts song "God Blessed the Broken Road", (okay, it was alright to do that when it first came out, but weddings need to move on), but I was certainly thinking it. They very much balance each other out. He's the Yen to her Yang, so to speak. She is very carefree, traditionally, and he seems to take a little more time to unwind (must be the Army major in him, or maybe the upper East Coast upbringing?) It's amusing to watch the series of the pictures I took of him move from the beginning of the week with somewhat 'composed' smiles, to a light-hearted, comfortable, and casual collection of smiles by the end of the week.

I imagine the anxiety of turning 30 as an unmarried woman may wear on a person. Some it seems not to bother, and I'll certainly say she handled it with grace. There were other boyfriends that talked of marriage, but she wouldn't sell out. She'd say she'd much rather wait a little while longer until it felt right. It may not have been the smoothest path the last 3 years, but we all believe it's prepared them for could be somewhat trying times of Army life ahead.

I'm glad she waited, a little while longer. And I'm so proud to have my new big brother, even if he dances with me with a 3 foot distance between us. :-)

***

God likes to make me wait. I get this. I need this, too. It brings me back to reality sometimes. Taking a year off work is not an easy thing to do, financially, but I wanted so badly to have a year with L like I did C (actually it was closer to 2 if you count student teaching, but I won't tell him). It's been amazing. It's truly been the year I SHOULD have taken off, I feel. Things have happened, good and bad, that I am so glad to have had flexibility to deal with due to not working this year. I wanted to do this at age 1, 2, 3...but $ and timing never seemed to work out. I waited, just a little while longer, and God had it all worked out. By staying home THIS year, I was able to:

take my kids to Disneyworld in a more mild-weathered, slower season (and it was the food and wine festival which pleased me very much!),



spend several days in New York City with my 'new' wonderful sister and her family,

lay on the couch for 8 weeks while very sick with our pregnancy,

take my time in grieving the loss of that baby,

spend several days with my good friend in Colorado,

volunteer in C's school each week for 2 or 3 hours,

take L to the most wonderful preschool ever created but that has difficult hours for a working mom to manage,

watch Clifford the Big Red Dog on Tuesdays and Thursdays while sipping coffee and snuggling with the most precious little boy in the world,

be there each day for my daughter - not putting her off because of the stack of papers or the unnecessary meeting I 'have' to go to afterschool,

finishing the construction, decorating, and unpacking & organizing of our home (I use the term 'finishing' lightly here),

and most of all, being a generally stress-free wife, mother, family member, and friend.

I'm glad I waited just a little longer.

The money thing, I'll admit, has been a bit of a stress-causer, but even more powerful, is that God has used the 'money thing' to show me over and over again that He does take care of me. Always. Especially when I think I've 'used up' all my chances. We are getting to the very end of the savings, yet there are two months left until a paycheck. God arranged with our Mortgager to send us an 'overage' that we paid (????) for $3500 today. God arranged for me to have a July with my kids, but that once a week I am working for a friend's business and that will cover all of our utilities and phone bills for the month. He knows our hearts, and He loves His children. I'm so glad for that. I pray He keeps showing Himself to me! (I don't mean the $, just the little miracles!)

There I'd let myself begin to worry and fret about these last two months, but if I'd just told myself to wait a little, I'd have remembered that God shows up just in time - how wonderful!

We Are Smitten

One of our favorite places to eat, is 'EAT' which is a fairly new restaurant here locally where the ingredients are all-natural, and the produce is locally grown. Very organic. We've never been disappointed in the menu, but you don't know what's being served that night until you get there.

The kids most recently ordered the carnival-style turkey leg with 'local' salad, and were glad to see it was served with a can of soda they hadn't tried yet. One sip and their eyes bugged out like little addicts. J & I quickly snagged the cans to see what the fuss was all about and quickly realized it was like drinking cotton candy. So I'm looking at the side of the can at the ingredients and nutritional facts to find it has NO HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP!! We make an effort not to eat too much of that around here. The sugar is pure cane sugar, and by golly you'd better hang on.

That's all.

Abundance

One thing I intended to work on this year 'off' was a better attitude, or a more healthy perspective, towards my daily life. Isn't it funny how we (maybe it's just me) may wake up and realize, "When did my brain get trained this way? Have I always looked at things that way?" Those kind of questions that pop in and confuse me to the point that I think, "Man. I need to stop thinking and eat something," even if it's just a banana, it usually relieves me of the stress of trying to figure those things out.

For example, somewhere along the backroads of life, I picked up the philosophy of scarcity. I'm not sure when or how this snuck its way in, but there is an over-riding feeling that things, opportunities, blessings, etc. will run out. I've never even thought that there was anything wrong with me thinking this way, but in reading a worthy blog I frequent: www.thatcoolbroad.com , I see there is hope of abundance.

She is worth checking out. What drove me to her site was an overwhelming feeling of being sick and tired of the narcissism of today's average society, the celebrity gossip and just basically the falseness we are being inundated with every time we turn our heads from the tv to the radio to the grocery store. She, and a few thousand other people, happen to think like me - which is a comfort, isn't it?

Anyway, she mentions that to help in changing your way of thinking, and being more content, having a mentality of abundance, rather than scarcity, allows you to free yourself up.

I like that.

I'm going for that.

If you know me, remind me of that. :-)

I Love Bedtime

J & I pretty much split the household and parental duties pretty nicely. We usually don't even need to have a conversation about it, I just pick up where I feel it's necessary and he does the same. I make dinner, he cleans it up (sometimes). And vice versa. I clean the living room, he runs to grab the vacuum to follow me. And since we've moved in over here, he puts L to bed, and I put C to bed. We'll each have some hang-out time in the other's room, collecting kisses and saying goodnight, but for the reading-until-they-pass-out time, we have our places.

I know, from listening to L at breakfast the next morning, that J repeats a lot of L's favorite stories from, "When he was a little boy" over and over. Sometimes they're the same, sometimes not, but L definitely has those stories by memory and has volume after volume in his Daddy collection. I think it's wonderful, and J shared many of those stories with C when she was little.

While they're in there talking about the adventures on Maple Drive, getting in trouble for...whatever, how he got this scar, or that scar, etc., C and I sip our tea and usually start by talking. I've already got the recap of her school day as soon as I pick her up from school (another favorite part of my day), but somehow, when she and I are cuddled up in her bed, (which, by the way, is the most comfortable one in the house - unfair!), the brief summary given after school stretches and the details come. She asks questions about things that are on her mind, we talk about what girl trips we'll take this summer, I read to her from her bible and tell her my favorite parts and what Jesus means right there, and so on. Sometimes she reads to me, if it's not too late. Tonight I even brought my laptop and we did online multiplication flash cards. Then we cuddle and tell each other how much we love each other, I try not to fall asleep in her bed, and then leave her to her dreams. (Then, usually, I go back into L's room and give him one more kiss while he's sleeping.)

I love these days. And I love bedtime.